Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Some Anxiety.

For the past six months, I've puttered along, trying to push the mommy worries aside and just enjoy the kids.

Time's up--Friday we face our next cardiology appointment. I don't have much hope that he will be calm during the ultrasound. So we may be going for a sedated ultrasound/ECG at a later date. Mommy dread commences.

He's so busy and eager and full of joy, I fall in love every time I see him. Tonight, he toddled away from me, looked over his shoulder, paused, giggled at me, toddled again, looked over his shoulder paused and giggled, repeated the process until he fell on the floor just as he was moving out of my sight. He is an amazing little guy.

I don't want to ever smother him or his sister with my worries--and oh my goodness how I worry. Sometimes I'm incredibly hacked off that my beautiful little guy will have to deal with this for his entire life. And sometimes I wonder if I'm to blame somehow--was I so stressed after the fire that I caused this malformation.

Maybe it's the dread/anticipation of the appointment that makes the anxiety so strong.

Here's hoping for a good report on Friday.

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Thursday, May 08, 2008

Good Grief! It is Mid-May Already

How did that happen? I wander through the house, thinking, "I really need to post this." Yet somehow I never seem to make it to the computer.

The HAED Challenge SAL is this weekend so I am finally posting my paltry progress from last month.
I have been busy stitching on the Frog Prince 3 for Angie and on Water Garden for my sil. Well, mostly Frog Prince as Kian has an ear infection and it's easier to stitch on FP, while holding him than the big WG. I need to focus on teacher gifts this month so they are completed by June. I have three to do: one large for Angie's main teacher and two smaller ones for the teacher aide and the other kindergarten teacher, who Angie adores. I also need to revisit the Tooth Fairy pillow so that I can finish charting the letters, then stitching and assembling it.

The problem: I don't wanna! I want to start lots and lots of new things.

I will be strong. I will.

Tomorrow, glory of glories, I have the day off. Angie's school has a Mother's Day breakfast so we are to wear our Sunday best. Only me though. Daddies and Kians are not allowed. This is just for the Mommies. Angie was telling me that they have been practicing songs and baking muffins for tomorrow. I had to create a top secret place mat for tomorrow. Should be fun.

Then on Saturday, we travel to see my Mom, and we'll visit my Dad as well because we have not seen him since he left for Florida in the Fall. So I may not have time for a SAL this weekend, but I sure will try.

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